Saturday, May 31, 2008

After the Rapture E-mails

What a great post I found by Jay over at DeoOmnisGloria! An email service just for our protestant brothers and sisters! (partial snippets here, ya'll - go to Jay's site for the complete post)

"According to a press release, YouveBeenLeftBehind.com employs a “dead-man’s switch” so that when the presumably saved operators of the Web site disappear, they will fail to take some sort of regularly scheduled action and the after-the-rapture e-mails will begin to go out.

OK, so let’s think about this for a moment, shall we? First, it’s not really a dead man’s switch, is it? It’s more like a “saved man’s” switch.

Apparently YouveBeenLeftBehind.com will send up to 62 emails out to your "left behind" friends and family explaining what happened when you are raptured. That's right, for the small fee of $40, you can send out messages to those left behind to explain the good news of Jesus Christ.

Now, I'm still trying to figure out why only 62 messages (you'll have to guess which 62 friends are least likely to be raptured). But it also appears that it's $40 a year until the rapture, which could be some time off (I'm not sure what Hal Lindsey's latest date is, but he could possibly be wrong)."

Ken Magill at Direct magazine has done a good job of breaking this down into some bite size scenarios (partial quotes here folks - go to the Ken's for more!):

"Who's going to be around at You've Been Left Behind to conduct ISP relations? Maybe the group should employ a staff of the damned to make sure things go smoothly after all those who are saved disappear. Some Unitarians would probably be up for the job--they're such an amenable bunch, after all.

And, envision the circumstances under which this service will operate: Among other things, four horsemen will have come riding out of the sky, the forces of righteousness will be locked in the ultimate battle with the antichrist, celestial trumpets are blowing, and the gates of hell are open and beckoning.

And someone's going to say: "Wait just a second while I check my e-mail?"

Jay goes on to say, "Just to explain from a Catholic perspective: The Book of Revelation (or The Apocalypse) is a book based on the Mass and is virtually impossible to understand without understanding the Catholic liturgy. Revelation explains that the liturgy we celebrate in Mass is an actual participation in the Heavenly Liturgy that is being celebrated at all times (and will be in Heaven forever).

It's important to note that the Rapture is primarily a 20th century concept, with little to no precedent for the belief. At this point in time there are multiple versions of the belief in the rapture: pre-millennial, post-millennial, even those who are essentially mid-millennial.

So, what is the Truth? Jesus Christ will come at the end of time and separate the wheat from the chaff, taking the wheat to heaven. Those who haven't achieved holiness, but aren't in mortal sin, will be perfected through purgatory.

I pray that through the Sacraments, we all become wheat for Jesus."

Amen Jay!

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Absolutely Hilarious!

Soutenus said...

So glad you thought so, too!
I shared this with a friend today . . . after explaining the "rapture," a basic review on the Book of Revelations, how "Left Behind" was kind of a buzz term . . . .whew . . . it just lost humor in the translation. At least he is going back to Mass with renewed interest in his cradle Catholic roots.

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